Tuesday, 10 November 2009

Still in limbo

If miraculously everything turns out alright with the acrobat in spite of all the bleeding, I'm five weeks pregnant today. 5w, 21dpo or 16dp5dt if I've got the whole counting system correct. I'm going to write down everything about the bleeding and all my symptoms because I've been desperately googling for more information during all this and maybe this post will eventually help someone in a future similar situation. Those of you who are faint hearted should probably stop reading here.
Oct 7 - Start stims day two of natural cycle
Oct 20 - Egg retrieval and TESA, 8 mature eggs retrieved, 5 successfully fertilized with ICSI - start vaginal progesterone suppositories - boobies start getting sore almost instantly
Oct 25 - Embryo transfer, 1 blastocyst transferred, 3 blastocysts frozen
Oct 26 - An hour flight from Sweden to England
Oct 27 - A pulling, tugging sensation in the baby department all day off and on
Oct 28 - First nose bleed ever and start falling asleep on the couch by 8 pm
Oct 30 - Light brown spotting after walk
Oct 31- Nov 1 - Spotting continues and gets a little heavier
Nov 1 - Get disgusted by crayfish that I normally LOVE
Nov 2 - Spotting starts to look like a light period, this is the day my period would have arrived in normal cycle (full moon)
Nov 3 - 4 - Bleeding increases and turns redder
Nov 5 - BFP!?!?! Red bleeding continues to increase
Nov 6 - 7 - Bleeding gets BRIGHT red and I pass small stringy clots. Start to get attacks of nausea and/or hunger 
Nov 8 - Find an old HPT in a drawer and take the test at night after drinking lots of water and peeing like a race horse... Get this:

Change insertion of progesterone suppositories from vaginal to anal in hopes to stop the bleeding, thinking they're irritating my cervix.
Nov 9 - Worst day of bleeding yet, like a full on period in a crimson red color. Go see doctor to take Beta HCG test.
Nov 10 - Bleeding seems to slow down, pass a few clots the size of a quarter (common during my regular period). I've felt nauseous all day, had hunger attacks and boobies are still sore. I've have had NO pain what so ever and that's weird... I normally have light-moderate period pains since they removed the polyp in February, before that severe pain... so you'd think if this was a miscarriage I'd be in pain... but what do I know.

I'm waiting to get the results from my Beta. I've called a gazillion times already and pestered them but each time they tell me the results aren't in yet and to call back in two hours. Now the damned clinic is closed for the day! SIGH! 

I'm slowly going crazy here and I really need to know what's going on with my body. If it is a miscarriage I need to have it confirmed so I can grieve and move on. If the numbers are within range (135-1690 mIU/ml for 20dpo)... well... I guess... I can worry a little longer... and keep wishing, hoping, praying that the numbers double for next tests, the acrobat hangs on tight, I stop bleeding and that this will all have a happy ending. 


  1. Geez, do we ALL need to start pestering them? Don't they know the torture you are experiencing? Sending supportive hugs. Thinking of you.

  2. I'm still sitting in the audience waiting with bated breath to see what happens. (((HUGS)))

  3. You poor thing!! I'm soo sorry honey I will keep praying that your numbers double and triple!! {{{hugs}}} Good luck chickie!!!

  4. So glad you went and got the beta..so angry they haven't gotten you an answer yet. Seriously, if you don't get an answer first thing tomorrow when they open.. you better hand out that number so we can all call.
    Keeping everything crossed for you. Keep us updated.

  5. *hugs* Being in limbo sucks. I so wish you weren't going through all this worry. I hope the bleeding stops and you are able to have a normal pregnancy.

  6. Sending you super beta vibes. 25% of women bleed in early pregnancy and many more so after IVF. Please keep the faith and we all will for you too!

  7. I am sooo sorry you are going through this. It is really very, very difficult I know. As everyone else has said there are so many women who bleed in early pregnancy, especially IVF pregnancy, I hope that is the case here as well. Keep taking good care of yourself and the little one and try to relax as best you can. Know that we are all pulling for you!!

  8. OMG, how could they close without calling you? No way!!

    Can you ask your RE to switch you to PIO shots? They aren't that bad.

    Just a thought. Praying for you.

  9. Holding you tightly in my thoughts and prayers. I can't believe they didn't call you back with your results today. I've got everything crossed for you.

  10. I understand how you must be feeling - waiting for beta results kills me. Sometimes it feels like they must be intentionally trying to tortue you. Hang in there, and remember that no matter what happens, a BFP is always a good thing! I know you'll get your little acrobat!

  11. I'm so glad you finally got your beta done! I bet you have a SCH (subchorionic hemmorhage). Hoping for a great beta number!

  12. I really want to fly over there and smack them upside the head. No really. Stop the torture people. You have been on my mind, and I am sending you lots of good thoughts. Hang in there.

  13. Why didn't they mark your BT urgent?

    Sorry you now have to wait to find out.

    Hoping & praying that everything is ok.

  14. Here from Mel - my thoughts are flying your way that things do indeed go the way you wish for them to. Should they not, I wish for you to find some measure of peace...somehow, someday. *gentle hugs*

  15. Argh how annoying that they didn't call you back!!

    Hoping that you get good numbers tomorrow my lovely.

    I'll be thinking of you!!

  16. ((HUGS))

    Wishing and praying that you get a great beta. I really hope the bleeding stops.

  17. So sorry that the clinic is leaving you hanging! I hope you get positive results soon so that you can move forward with a little less worry. Thinking of you...

  18. Totally hoping that it would turn out alright for you. Please take care and stay good.

    All the best!


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