Showing posts with label bleeding. Show all posts
Showing posts with label bleeding. Show all posts

Friday, 13 November 2009

Friday the 13th

This should be a long post but I don't know if I have the strength to write. I'll try to stick to the bare minimum so I can at least keep you all updated. I can't thank you enough for all your support through this nightmare.

Yesterday afternoon I went to the ER at the Military Hospital and got hooked up to an IV as soon as they noticed my heart rate was over a hundred. Got examined inside and out and they ran more tests than I could keep track of. Apparently my blood pressure was also very high (I'm normally on the low end of normal BP). They saw lots of blood, it was actually gushing out at them as they were examining me... scary. They couldn't find the acrobat anywhere. Not in uterus, cervix, tubes or ovaries. My HCG came back at 1000. They also called the NHS clinic I'd been to on Monday to get the result from that bloodtest... and suddenly the results had magically appeared (it wasn't there a few hours earlier when I called!! OK, I won't get in to that whole mess today). Monday's HCG was 415!? The ER doctor scratched his head and didn't know what to make of it so he paged the OBGYN on call. She came down. Repeated all the probing and poking. Looked over all the test results and told me that I had probably just had a miscarriage when I arrived at the clinic and that she was going to give me some meds to stop the bleeding and make my uterus contract. I said "No Thank You" and asked to come back in the morning to recheck the HCG levels and get that miscarriage confirmed before I took any meds. She said alright and told me the bleeding should be slowing down and my HCG levels should stop or drop.

This morning I went back to the Military Hospital. Waited for an hour and a half to get the result (needless to say I'm never going back to the NHS clinic I went Monday even if the drive down to base is 45 min). Went up to the OBGYN and met Dr. Swedish (crazy, an american who spoke swedish fluently after living a couple of miles from the swedish town I grew up for 2 years). He went over the notes from yesterdays visit to the ER with me, looked at todays HCG result and scratched his head. Todays HCG was 1300. He got me up on the table, brought out the wand and gave me another good scan. He was greeted by a blood bath. He saw nothing. Except... maybe... a tiny speck on the uterine wall. He then gave me the verdict. "It's a mystery. It's possibly an ectopic pregnancy, but we just can't be sure until your HCG levels are at 1500." I guess that's the magic number when they're able to see the embryo on an ultrasound. He said "we can either do a D&C and see if the tissue we remove contain an embryo and/or we can give you methotrexate to help your body terminate the pregnancy no matter where in your body it is". I was confused. So if they'd do a D&C to remove tissue from my uterus and they found the embryo there... wouldn't that in fact mean they would kill the embryo to rule out an ectopic? So again I said "No Thank You, what other options do I have?". He told me that if another blood test showed my kidneys functioning ok and that I'm not too anemic he'd consider waiting until Sunday when my HCG levels would surely be over 1500 if the pregnancy continued to develop, he could then make sure the acrobat wasn't hiding somewhere in my uterus and comfortably give me methotrexate to terminate an ectopic pregnancy. And if my levels would still be under 1500 that would mean it's not a normal pregnancy and a D&C would just help nature along. I went and had the blood work done and was cleared to wait until Sunday. Before we left I asked if there was any chance of bringing home a healthy baby from a pregnancy that starts out like this. He said: "probably less than a 1% chance". 

So that's where we stand. In a great vast landscape of gray. 

Thursday, 12 November 2009

Time to go to the ER

This is the eighth day of bleeding. I'm now soaking a pad an hour and there's no end in sight. Feeling exhausted and devastated. Still no HCG test results. I think it's time to go to the ER. 

Tuesday, 10 November 2009

Still in limbo

If miraculously everything turns out alright with the acrobat in spite of all the bleeding, I'm five weeks pregnant today. 5w, 21dpo or 16dp5dt if I've got the whole counting system correct. I'm going to write down everything about the bleeding and all my symptoms because I've been desperately googling for more information during all this and maybe this post will eventually help someone in a future similar situation. Those of you who are faint hearted should probably stop reading here.
 
Oct 7 - Start stims day two of natural cycle
Oct 20 - Egg retrieval and TESA, 8 mature eggs retrieved, 5 successfully fertilized with ICSI - start vaginal progesterone suppositories - boobies start getting sore almost instantly
Oct 25 - Embryo transfer, 1 blastocyst transferred, 3 blastocysts frozen
Oct 26 - An hour flight from Sweden to England
Oct 27 - A pulling, tugging sensation in the baby department all day off and on
Oct 28 - First nose bleed ever and start falling asleep on the couch by 8 pm
Oct 30 - Light brown spotting after walk
Oct 31- Nov 1 - Spotting continues and gets a little heavier
Nov 1 - Get disgusted by crayfish that I normally LOVE
Nov 2 - Spotting starts to look like a light period, this is the day my period would have arrived in normal cycle (full moon)
Nov 3 - 4 - Bleeding increases and turns redder
Nov 5 - BFP!?!?! Red bleeding continues to increase
Nov 6 - 7 - Bleeding gets BRIGHT red and I pass small stringy clots. Start to get attacks of nausea and/or hunger 
Nov 8 - Find an old HPT in a drawer and take the test at night after drinking lots of water and peeing like a race horse... Get this:

Change insertion of progesterone suppositories from vaginal to anal in hopes to stop the bleeding, thinking they're irritating my cervix.
Nov 9 - Worst day of bleeding yet, like a full on period in a crimson red color. Go see doctor to take Beta HCG test.
Nov 10 - Bleeding seems to slow down, pass a few clots the size of a quarter (common during my regular period). I've felt nauseous all day, had hunger attacks and boobies are still sore. I've have had NO pain what so ever and that's weird... I normally have light-moderate period pains since they removed the polyp in February, before that severe pain... so you'd think if this was a miscarriage I'd be in pain... but what do I know.

I'm waiting to get the results from my Beta. I've called a gazillion times already and pestered them but each time they tell me the results aren't in yet and to call back in two hours. Now the damned clinic is closed for the day! SIGH! 

I'm slowly going crazy here and I really need to know what's going on with my body. If it is a miscarriage I need to have it confirmed so I can grieve and move on. If the numbers are within range (135-1690 mIU/ml for 20dpo)... well... I guess... I can worry a little longer... and keep wishing, hoping, praying that the numbers double for next tests, the acrobat hangs on tight, I stop bleeding and that this will all have a happy ending.