Monday, 5 October 2009

This is the week

This is the week we join the circus. I'm supposed to start injecting myself with Gonal-F some time around Thursday depending on when The Bloody Monster makes her appearance. No more virgin belly. No more head in the sand thinking this problem will go away on its own. Holy crap, it's really happening! I'm so overwhelmed with opposing emotions and don't really know how to deal with all this. I'm so happy I could dance and at the same time I have this deep sadness lurking in the background. I'm so full of hope I could burst and at the same time a dark fear of failure is constantly stalking me. In essence these emotions land me on a rocky neutral where I'm constantly at risk for falling. Kind of like walking the tight rope. Wish me luck.


  1. Oh, it is very exciting to finally get going with a med cycle. I started TTC in January 2007 and through various roadblocks, like yours, didn't do my first medicated cycle until September 2008. I was so ready to dive in at that point. But I totally agree with you, that there's some fear that now that you're bringing in the big guns, you don't have that spectre as a safety net anymore.

    Best of luck, I hope the first time's the charm! You deserve some good luck!

  2. Good luck with the injections! I hope you have no side effects and get your bfp.

  3. Good luck with the meds! I hope it all works out. I understand being overwhelmed with darkness and light. It is a big step! Have a fun time with it, if you can.

    Have a great day!

  4. Good luck!! It can be scary and overwhelming but in the end you'll look back and say that wasn't so bad. This is your month!! Sending you positive BFP vibes!! I'll be right there with you, starting Lupron on Thursday. Here's to BFP for all of us cycling in October!!

  5. Hi Again,
    Thank you for posting on my blog, I just wanted to
    respond to your question but was unsure of how to
    do it (I'm a new blogger) Yes there is such thing as
    hypnosis for fertility, and even though I teach hypnosis
    for childbirth I never thought to try this for my own
    If you find a hypnotherapist in your area
    they would be able to work with negative thoughts
    surrounding pregnancy/birth/parenting. Hypnosis
    is really quite amazing, and I know that it works.
    I'm really going to try and complement my
    treatments with some hypnosis and see how I feel
    for the next little bit. I have to feel at least a little
    better then I do now. Check out this book, I found
    it on line and one of the Hypnotherapists in my
    course on the weekend recommended it to me. It
    may at least explain why hypnosis could work.

  6. Best wishes! I hope everything is text book.

  7. Awww, sending gobs of luck your way for sure! However this tightrope-walking cycle turns out, you've got a big ol' bouncy safety net of folks here pulling for you...

  8. One shot at a time! You will do fine. It is definitely a roller coaster, but you just have to break it down in phases and focus on that. Phase 1 - wait for AF and go in for your first check. Good luck! - Tkeys

  9. I nominated you for an award on my blog. Come check it out.

  10. Good Luck! Wishing you all the best and hoping you only have to do this once!

  11. Congrats Circus girl!! Your virgin Belly I'm sure will do just fine!! I can't wait to hear all about those shots!! I'm soo nervous about them. But it will be a piece of cake for you I'm sure!!!


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