You see, I spoke to Dr. Boss Lady last week. I asked a million questions. Questions like: What went wrong? Should we try something different? Why have 3 out of 4 beautiful blasts not made it? She had one answer: "We simply haven't gotten to the right embryo".
Sigh.
Swedes in general are a trusting people. Especially when it comes to medical care. But I've lived in the land of "question everything" too long to just accept a simple "leave it to chance" answer. Even if I should. Even when Dr. Boss Lady started getting slightly annoyed.
I asked her about doing immunology testing and she said they simply don't do that unless you've had three miscarriages. I asked if she thought my period being two days late and the "invisaline" on HPT 10dp5dt could be an indication of a chemical pregnancy. She said there's no way to find out and she doesn't recommend an HCG-test, "just wait and see if you ovulate this month". I asked what she thought about my BBT not going down as much as expected when I started bleeding. She asked why I was charting and told me to stop it. I asked about putting me on a low dose of aspirin, she said it would be "like shooting in the dark".
Insert me banging my head against the wall.
In spite of everything else that's going on in our life Diver Dude convinced me that we should just go ahead with embaby #3 this month. So I'm getting right back up in the saddle again. And I plan to hang on for dear life. I'm hoping to get a positive OPK sometime tomorrow or Wednesday, leave for Sweden Wednesday night, u/s to confirm ovulation on Friday and ET end of this month. Crazy. I know.
And after some consideration I might just go rogue and take baby aspirin in spite of what Dr. Boss Lady says. 'Cause I don't mind shooting in the dark if it gives me a better chance of actually hitting the target. Am I being crazy?
Be careful with the aspirin. It can work two ways (eg help implantation & inhibit implantation).
ReplyDeleteI can understand you banging you head at Boss Lady. Here in Australia, they let you do immunology testing after a failed 3rd stim cycle.
Wishing you luck.
I so wish you could do some immune testing... here in Cairo we can do whatever tests we want, we go to a lab, we pay, we test what we want, its kinda cool. Anyway, I say start with low dose aspirin, why not. This had got to be it. If you want to come to Cairo, i got a room for ya girl! xoxox
ReplyDeleteThis is exactly why I dumped my former RE. She refused to consider immune testing (which I am at a higher risk for given that I have endo). Of course being treated for the immune issue I do have didn't seem to help either. Three "perfect" blasts later and I have one miscarriage under my belt and no baby. Supremely frustrating. I get it.
ReplyDeleteNot at all, and I would definitely do the autoimmune testing also. Can you do them there instead than in Sweden? And no harm at all taking the baby-aspirin, so why not??
ReplyDeleteGreat that you go again this month, the fact that you can do it on a natural cycle is just so great (my clinic said no...). Love, Fran
Ugh. Why can't we just have whatever tests we feel we need? I know we don't go to medical school but for goodness sake it's our bodies, and our babies, and if I need a darn test to help me feel like we've done everything I should be able to have that test. So sorry. I did have the immune & clotting testing and was left just as clueless, but at least I then knew it WASN'T those things. As for baby aspirin, I am on it right now. It doesn't harm, so why not? I'm on Lovenox as well, which does the same thing as baby aspirin, but taking the baby aspirin just gives me that extra piece of mind. Good luck and I am hoping au naturel is the key to your success!! :)
ReplyDeleteYou know what something we learn't you do what you have to do! Your paying for this not them and this is the reason we dumped our first RE because after 10 transfers we still hadn't taken home our dream. We changed RE's and she got is PG first go and the only thing she did was take us to blast instead of a 3 day transfer. Our old RE didn't think taking it to blast would make any difference!
ReplyDeleteI think baby aspirin is fine! And I think whatever you do is fine...because it's YOU. Which makes me mad, because your doctor should be looking at YOU and not just your innerds. Ugh. Extra hugs.
ReplyDeleteGosh, I know nothing of FET from personal experience. I know one friend who had 1 last chance with 1 FET au natural, I think she said 10% chance of a baby, and her miracle is now a baby.
ReplyDeleteIs it a case of you wanting to DO something, to get this to work?
Wishing you more baby than aspirin...
(hugs)
My first RE gave baby aspirin to everyone. Second one, not so much. I don't know what to tell you expect...I'm rooting for you over here!
ReplyDeleteI vote take the aspirin! I vote taking over your own medical care, and not feeling bad for asking questions and pushing it if it doesn't seem right!!! I really hope this one is it for you!!!
ReplyDeleteUgh. No answers - so frustrating! Not sure about the aspirin but if she didn't say anything about it hurting your chances then I might add it. I'm wishing you tons of luck with your upcoming FET. C'mon universe, this has got to be The One for circus princess!
ReplyDeleteI actually think baby aspirin is a "no harm, no foul" option. My RE puts everyone on it - he said the studies indicate that it *can* be a help and he has seen no harm, so he thinks it is a good protocol. Just 1 81 mg pill a day.
ReplyDeleteGood luck with this! On one level, your dr is right - there often isn't any rhyme or reason. It is unclear if transfers are more effective via a "natural" FET or if the chemicals/drugs are better (ensure a better lining). Also, sometimes, an entire batch of embies from 1 IVF can be....imperfect. Sometimes, people have no luck with a fresh cycle or any of the frozen out of it, but the next cycle they hit it out of the park (because the quality of the embryos is better - perhaps better planning with the meds). My RE usually recommends a new fresh IVF over doing a bunch of frozen transfers - the goal to get better quality embies. Good luck this cycle! - Tkeys
Sweetie - go ahead with the baby aspirin! I don't know what your clinic is thinking when most of the other Swedish and European clinics my group is involved with seem to think it is a good thing.
ReplyDeleteIt helps avoid pre-eclampsia, it is almost standard procedure for maternity clinics in the Stockholm area to prescribe a low dose of aspirin to all mommies-to-be over 35 and it apparently also increases blood flow.
Anyhow, good luck!
I would take the asprin. It may not help at all, but it won't hurt anything. All it can do is help. That sucks that your doctor isn't really thinking out of the box. I hope you get success with this cycle.
ReplyDeleteif it makes sense to you then do it. i am really hoping that this is it for you!
ReplyDeleteAutoimmune testing seems totally logical to me and don't blame you for wanting it. I also don't blame you for wanting to take the baby aspirin. I say if the baby aspirin won't hurt, then go for it :)
ReplyDeleteThat sounds so frustrating! I hope you can get some real answers soon! I hate when doctors or nurses skirt around the issues!
ReplyDeleteWhat a frustrating conversation - sounds a bit like my old clinic, where they really didn't like it if I questioned anything, but didn't seem to be doing anything extra themselves to find answers to those questions. At least with my new clinic I know that every avenue has been explored - and knowing that, I can relax and hand over all the thinking to them (so far).
ReplyDeleteI'd go with the aspirin - I don't see that it can do any harm, and it could help.